Each sign of the Zodiac emits a particular type of energy signature, shaped by its element, modality, and point of rulership. The four elements – Air, Earth, Fire, and Water – apply to three signs each: Libra/Aquarius/Gemini, Capricorn/Taurus/Virgo, Aries/Leo/Sagittarius, and Cancer/Scorpio/Pisces (respectively). There are three modalities – Cardinal, Fixed, and Mutable – that apply to four signs each: Aries/Cancer/Libra/Capricorn, Taurus/Leo/Scorpio/Aquarius, and Gemini/Virgo/Sagittarius/Pisces (respectively). Aries is ruled by Mars, Taurus by Venus, and so on.
Air is thought; Earth is the physical; Fire is spiritual, and Water is the emotions. Cardinal energy initiates and leads; Fixed energy stabilizes and orders; Mutable energy adapts and serves. Points express the “ideal” of the energy. Combine the element, modality, and point of rulership and you get a unique signature for each sign that helps us understand the nature and “application” of that sign out in the world. This article will look at some humorous ways to understand the signs, both in terms of their positive and negative expressions.
Astrology is a complex tool and a wonderful subject for serious study; I work with it professionally and constantly encourage people and readers of my articles to get their full chart cast by a professional astrologer using professional astrology software. To get your full chart cast, you need to know your birth date, birth location, and birth time. All three are essential for casting an accurate chart. This complex understanding and use of astrology is not as well-known as the daily horoscope, which makes pronouncements about the Sun signs.
Because astrology is so widely known through Sun signs, a lot of humor about the signs constantly shows up on websites, printed cards, t-shirts, and so on. As someone who works with astrology constantly, I can often find the humor quite insightful and fun to “play around” with. This article contains some of my attempts at humorous reductions of the signs of the Zodiac to convey some of the archetypical meaning in a playful way through quotes you could put on a t-shirt to give as a gift to a friend, co-worker, or family member.
Aries is the Cardinal Fire sign of the Zodiac, which means it “initiates spiritually”. The sign of “I act”.
“I act, let me help!”
“I act, get the hell out of my way!”
Taurus is the Fixed Earth sign of the Zodiac, which means it “stabilizes and secures”. The sign of “I need”.
“I persist, you can count on me!”
“I persist and won’t ever change for you.”
Gemini is the Mutable Air sign of the Zodiac, which means it “communicates and learns”. The sign of “I seek”.
“I love to learn, let me share what I know!”
“I love to learn; stick, ball, squirrel!!”
Cancer is the Cardinal Water sign of the Zodiac, which means it “nurtures and protects”. The sign of “I care”.
“I nurture, let me take care of you!”
“I nurture, let me sMother you!”
Leo is the Fixed Fire sign of the Zodiac, which means it “leads and plays”. The sign of “I stand out”.
“I shine, let me entertain you!”
“I shine; love me or I will hate you!”
Virgo is the Mutable Earth sign of the Zodiac, which means it “serves and solves”. The sign of “I help”.
“I perfect; what can I do to help you!”
“I perfect, let me point out all your faults!”
Libra is the Cardinal Air sign of the Zodiac, which means it “relates and analyzes”. The sign of “I connect”.
“I relate; what can we do together?!”
“I relate; I will never leave you alone!”
Scorpio is the Fixed Water sign of the Zodiac, which means it “transforms and penetrates”. The sign of “I change”.
“I regenerate; I will protect you!”
“I regenerate, I am here to torture you!”
Sagittarius is the Mutable Fire sign of the Zodiac, which means it “expands and proselytizes”. The sign of “I know”.
“I expand, let me show you the world!”
“I expand; get out of my way!”
Capricorn is the Cardinal Earth sign of the Zodiac, which means it “achieves and excels”. The sign of “I succeed”.
“I succeed; let me share with you!”
“I succeed; you are a speed bump on my drive to achieve!”
Aquarius is the Fixed Air sign of the Zodiac, which means it “revolutionizes and awakens”. The sign of “I idealize”.
“I idealize; let’s be authentic together!”
“I idealize; who you calling weird, weirdo!”
Pisces is the Mutable Water sign of the Zodiac, which means it “spiritualizes and cleanses”. The sign of “I imagine”.
“I dream; let’s share a dream!”
“I dream; you are my addiction!”
